Table of Contents
An Overall Look At Healing A Relationship
Healing A Friendship
You Must Build Trust
Find The Good In Everyone
Live In The Here And Now
Do What You Love
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The bonds of friendly relationship, while strong, can be broken by thoughtless action, deeds, words, etc. The fact is, we have probably all, at a time or another, said or done something that lead to the departure of a friend.
Regaining A Friend
Hopefully you learned from losing one friend and didn’t lose others to the same errors. However, this isn’t about that, it’s about how to fix broken friendship bonds. It’s possible to fix a friendship, but just like the regaining of anything worthwhile, it’s going to take time, effort, and want. So, attempt the following:
Be the first to say sorry, even if you don’t think it’s your mistake, you are able to be sorry about what the consequences were. A earnest apology for the disillusionment of friendship is a must when it bears on fixing broken bonds. Generally, even if the bonds break due to time or distance, there’s some fault to be had, and a beneficial apology is going to do marvels for getting things back on track. So, take the fault for letting things go bad, or not maintaining the communication, or whatever it is that lead to the trouble, or at least apologize for the final result. Make certain you do this in the flesh. Be earnest. Know what you’re apologizing for. An apology is the opening move, but the apology doesn’t solve anything without action.
This goes to the next step. So, take action. It’s up to you to offer a friendly look, hand, etc. Put yourself out there a bit and do something nice. If your friendship bonds were breached simply because of distance and time, then be the first to restore communication. Don’t anticipate anything from them. Merely send an e-mail, text them from time to time, and be willing to accept that they might not be interested in fixing the bonds, at any rate not at first. Many times individuals will want to see earnest intent and real effort before exercising any of their own. They’ll want to know that they’re not blowing their time, or setting themselves up for failure by being your friend once more. So, call them. Do the asking over. Remember their birthday, or important dates in their life. Do whatever it takes to show them you’re earnest about fixing the bonds. This is particularly important if you did something to damage the relationship.
Resume communicating. A big part of every successful relationship is communicating. So, to fix a broken friendship, resume the communication. Call merely to talk. E-mail well wishes, check in, etcetera. You have to begin talking again for starters, and crank it up from there.
After some time, hold out and invite. At times the heart needs time to heal, and so keep in contact with somebody, but don’t hurry things. Let them see your earnestness, and your desire to be friends through uniform communication before you step it up a notch. Once you’ve shown consistency, begin extending invitations. Go out in groups initially to help dispel awkwardness. Then do something casual, eventually you’ll be able to get back to fun person-to-person, but it can take some time before you’re easy doing this.
Go forward doing so until it’s reciprocated or you’re told to give up asking. Things take time to heal. Regardless how long it takes for them to accept an invitation, or offer an invite in return doesn’t matter. You have to be the one who’s vulnerable, who looks like an moron if you want to repair a friendship bond. So, keep inquiring until they say to stop, or, (hopefully) consent.
Honesty is critical to making effective changes and discovering who you really are and what you truly want and repairing relationships.
Honesty Is Key
When you lie about who you are or what you truly believe, you reinforce the idea that you need to make believe to be somebody else or that you’re not fundamentally “good enough”. Worse you sabotage virtually every other key principle for relationship building because they’re based on the premise that you have identified your bona fide self and your goals. This is impossible to achieve if you’re denying or betraying yourself. Without the truth of who you are and what you truly want, you can’t have clarity in life and you can’t achieve your dreams or build relationships because you have no true direction.
Many individuals use self-deceit and denial as a way of averting having to deal with issues about themselves, their circumstances, individuals around them or consequences from the past. What they frequently don’t realize is that this locks them in to an ineffective cycle of self-sabotage and poor self-regard that blocks their ability to move forward in their lives and prevents them from building or repairing relationships.
Being honest doesn’t mean that you have to confront all of your demons directly, but it does require that you make an truthful start at identifying where your issues lie and accepting what they are. By discovering your issues, you’re more able to see past them to your authentic self. Once you’ve identified your authentic self, it’s easier to determine what it is you truly want. And then you can start to move forward.
You need to practice honesty at every level of your life, not merely with yourself. When you’re dishonest, you’re effectively saying that you’re not worthy enough, that you don’t deserve beneficial things and that the only way to get things is to lie or cheat. It really doesn’t matter what it is… lying, cheating, stealing to amplifying what you have done to impress individuals, not correcting too much change accidentally given to you, having an affair… at the most central level these things are not honest and won’t help in repairing relationships.
The good news is that with practice being honest gets a lot more comfortable, particularly when you realize that other people start to identify your authenticity and their respect grows consequently. Moreover you’ll be considered a far more reliable and balanced individual because everybody will know exactly where they are with you.
Lastly I would like to remind you to be thoughtful and to always bring your truth from a loving place. Too often I’ve seen truth used in extra ways, used like a weapon, wielded sanctimoniously like a sword and inducing misery and mayhem to all around. If you’ve found your honesty and your truth, you’ll also have discovered many other spiritual tools to help you cope with some of the difficulties that arise when you confront it. Remember that a lot of of those around you will not be outfitted with these advantages, so tread cautiously. Not lying is not the same as throwing your truth on everybody around. Stay honest with yourself, be honest with other people and always come from a loving place and you will be on your way to repairing relationships!Other Details
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